When your thoughts takeover they can make you lose control of reality. At times, it can be so difficult not to worry and not to let your concerns overcome you. In my case, it makes it better for me to write it out and reread what I know I should do and try to gear my mind in the thought process I know is the best and the healthiest for me. Writing it out acts as my reminder … I know there is a lot of positive around me and I need to focus on these aspects instead of what is worrying me… but its easier said then done.
This blurb is simply to tell myself that there are some things you cannot control, some reactions that are unexpected, some people that have their ways… the only control you have is on yourself and on how you choose to deal and handle it all.
Everyone has their bubble where they can live in from time to time. Everyone has an escape to a safe place.
Sometimes, ok often, I like to live in my bubble where I feel reassured, safe and comfortable. What I mean by living in my bubble is more linked to the feeling of being able to be me … FULLY me! It means being surrounded with some indispensable people that to me make me want to live every single day and that know & accept me, it means being honest and truthful, it means feeling inspired and moved by the many little wonders of life and it means that I dont have think, but just be.
On the other hand, there are times where life is so fast pace and times where I don’t even notice that I’m so caught up that I can’t even enjoy being in my little bubble. Sometimes a bubble is a MUST to physically and/or mentally escape real life. A physical escape is where I would end up in my car driving with no destination, walking around Montreal at crazy hours, staring out at various views, traveling to be inspired… A mental escape is where I would write about so many different things for days, where I practiced a few exercices of mindfulness, where I got lost in my books or movies/shows, where I listened to music for hours and hours. I must say that whether physical or mental, an escape is sometimes needed, and in fact, it’s sometimes healthy.
Be bubbly! Be wYse,
Inspired from a song I truly love “Be As You Are” by Mike Posner … this is how I felt lately:
“There are moments when you fall to the ground
But you are stronger than you feel you are now.
You don’t always have to speak so loud,
Just be as you are.
Life is not always a comfortable ride
Everybody’s got scars that they hide
And everybody plays the fool sometimes,
Just be as you are.”
There are moments that are tougher in life and everyone has the right to fall down at times. We tend to think that it’s not normal to feel down, but we should listen to our hearts, feel as we feel and be as we are. I remind myself that its OK to NOT be OK from time to time (which was actually recently explicitly mentioned to me by a friend). I was very reflective about this and came to realize that its my choice to determine what I consider tough and that its more important to try and understand my feelings then fight against them.
I also realized that we often say its not a big deal or that we will be okay, but truthfully we are all different and consider different things difficult and its our right to do so. We should embrace this part as its more telling about who we are and can help us understand and find better ways of coping.
“The truth is, many of us are looking for the approval of those closest to us on some level or another. And often this is disguised by the desire to have someone understand what we are talking about or going through, anything important to us about ourselves. I always thought I just wanted them to ‘get it.’ In reality, I wanted them to get it so that they would be okay with me.”- JADE MAZARIN
Validity of the advice vs seeking validation?
The truth is that most of us seek validation occasionally. I dont seek for the advice but for validation and way too often. Unfortunately, it became a need and its unhealthy because it doesn’t make me assertive and stay strong to what I truly think. For some subjects, it makes me doubt, makes me question my own capacities in some areas and it makes me indecisive and as a result I have some opinions that are not well formed.
I chose tow write about it and just say it out loud because I want to tell myself to take your own advice and work hard to rewire my brain. My motto is mind/matter for a reason and I want to be able to succeed at it in this particular area. I think my first step is to determine what is the real cause of this need of validation from others and understand it before correcting it. For now I think its part of the way my mind works and makes me think of the saying “old habits dies hard” but in this case its like if a certain way of mind is still lingering and I don’t want to accept anymore. This mindset brings me down and like I have overcome many things and got rid of so many insecurities, I am more then ready to work on this and work on accepting my own gut, my own opinions and validating what I think despite others’ opinions.
This may be odd but there is something so soothing of the sound of rain drops hitting a window. Looking outside, Its dark, but there is just enough light for you to see the drops accumulating on the window and then dripping down slowly. Its quite relaxing to listen to the light hit of every drop on the window while with a good book and savoury glass of red wine.
These past months, my mind has been juggling so many things at once and tonight the sound of raindrops hitting my window made me want to write and simply let my thoughts wonder. I like to remind myself of how so many things may just pass us by… this was a very simple moment but one I enjoyed a lot.